Some ideas I've had when I was supposed to be having others.
CATNIPE
Cats can be cold hearted snobs to their humans. It hurts.
A fragrance derived from catnip might help humans rekindle the relationship.
CUPPA T-SHIRTS
The biggest benefit of having children is training them to make you a cuppa tea.
But brewing it just how you like it can take them years. Years you don't have.
With a Cuppa T-Shirt, they can simply match the colour of your tea, with the colour of their tee.
DESIGNER MODEMS
You spend ages decorating your home. Then you get an internet provider, and a horrible plastic box.
Designer modems come in many beautiful forms, including vases and globes, made to match your decor.
HATEBOARDS
Picking a new board sometimes comes down to how much you like the graphic.
And when you really like it, scratching it off kind of sucks.
Hateboards have graphics you want to scratch off, which helps you push your skating, pain free. 
Available in commonly hated politicians, foods and celebrities.